Seduction - Mid-Century Style or Plus Ca Change....

To Read And Enjoy

Tessa Scoffs has recommended what has become my new favorite boy blog

Admiral Cod written by Laguna Beach Trad

Why do I adore this blog?

Maybe it's because of the multi-lingual posts

or the interesting choice of music videos

or the unabashed anglo-german-franco-philia

or the attitude about the investment business

or maybe it's because the blogger, so very un-Laguna like, wears the full on prep attire of rep ties, alden shoes, pink shirts, topsiders and madras shorts like my ex-fiance wore when we both lived Laguna Beach.

Oh...So That Explains It

I love reading about obscure medical studies
because the more of them that you read the more likely you will find one that reinforces some projection that you have about yourself and your well being.

Take for example the study by the Copenhagen University Hospital that found that the thinner your thighs, the greater your risk of heart disease. So after all these years of being disappointed because I didn't inherit my mother's gazelle like legs, I can finally be happy with my haunches. (Now if I can only find a study that will say that my acne and fat ass will prevent future arthritis, allergies and Alzheimer's...)

Or you will find a study that explains some current social or cultural phenomena that has had you shaking your head.
Like this one from the University of Sheffield
Taking the pill for past 40 years 'has put women off masculine men'

Scientists say the hormones in the oral contraceptive suppress a woman's interest in masculine men and make boyish men more attractive.
If the theory is right, it could partly explain the shifting in tastes from macho 1950s and 1960s stars such as Kirk Douglas and Sean Connery to the more wimpy, androgynous stars of today, such as Johnny Depp and Russell Brand.
Here is the explanation
On days when women are not fertile, their tastes swing towards more feminine, boyish faces and more caring personalities, researchers have shown.
However, if women are taking the Pill they no longer have fertile days.
That means they no longer experience the hormonal changes that make them more attracted to masculine men and those with dissimilar genetic make-up.
Well that seems logical

And I guess that explains why stars with masculine looks like Gary Cooper

have been replaced with baby faced effeminate stars like Zac Efron

I fear for our world

Modern Manners - French Style

Le Petit Journal : Jacques Chirac gaulé
by CANALPLUS

No understanding of french is necessary

The look on Madame Chirac's face...priceless

and in case you missed this from the Huffington Post

French Divorce Ruling Allows Text Messages As Evidence

AP - Unfaithful spouses in France beware: Passionate text messages sent to mistresses and lovers can now be used as evidence against you in a divorce.
Experts say the recent ruling by France's Supreme Court to accept phone exchanges as legitimate proof of adultery will make it easier for the French to get divorced. Previously, French husbands and wives often had to wait for years to escape a marriage if they could not prove that their spouse was misbehaving or mistreating them.

At least Chirac wasn't texting

Back To Bed

As impressed as I am with having a television attached to the bed

I'm wondering if there is a statistical significance between having a TV in the bedroom and the rate of divorce.

Man Style - Is This What Men Want In A Bed?

According to this article from WSJ
Pimp my Bed: The Male Sleep Lair
Manufacturers, such as Hollandia, are catering to men in terms of design of mattresses and beds.
And what do men want?
After years of catering to women, manufacturers are setting their sights on men. The new macho mattresses they're introducing have "muscle-recovery properties" and cooling technology, on the theory that men are more likely to feel too hot in bed. The bed frames feature built-in TVs, iPod docking stations, wine coolers, safes and other guy-friendly gadgetry.
OK, I get the cool matress thing...because I've never known of any man who wasn't just naturally hotter, in bed and out, than a woman.
Meir Kryger, a physician at the Gaylord Sleep Medicine Centers in Connecticut and a past president of the National Sleep Foundation, a nonprofit that supports sleep-related research, says he isn't aware of any scientific evidence of men being warmer in bed than women.
No scientific evidence yet we have the whole air conditioning thing
Michael Zippelli, Dormia's CEO, acknowledges he has no scientific proof that men tend to feel warmer, but he says anecdotal evidence from his customers is persuasive. "Ask 10 girls in an office if it's cold or not and see what happens," he says. "It's a war of air conditioning."
Cooling mattress technology...awesome
And, I get the whole gadget thing because men really like gadgets
Except for the safe thing
Who needs a safe in their bed?
Maybe a hidden compartment in a side table for a gun, as someone I used to know had,
but full on safe...really?
And I have to ask myself, what does a man's bed design tell about him?
Take this bed for example




Hollandia International’s ‘Executive’ bed includes a 32-inch TV in the footboard. Storage in headboard and footboard lets men pare down furnishings to the essentials.




Well it's a minimalist design in an "American Gigolo" gray
OK...not bad...elegant, functional, masculine
But what about this bed?

Hollandia International’s ‘Glow’ bed contains discreet storage units and dresser drawers

Sleek yes, in a "2001" way, but the shiny neon orchid color is just so, not good.

And finally we come to this, the non plus ultra if you will of male beds.

Hollandia International’s ‘Sphere’ bed, includes a champagne cooler just in case. The cave-like structure comes in fabrics including suede and microfiber. The flat screen TV is embedded in frame, and includes a remote control.

Well, when it comes to this bed I could get into a whole discourse on Mod Design meets Freudian need to return to the womb, but I will spare you.
Seriously, I can't look at this bed with out thinking
who could possibly want to get shagged by "Austin Powers"

Les Femmes Sont Incroyables - C'est Evident!

CRISE DE LA CINQUANTAINE
Nous, les hommes, sommes d'éternels incompris !

Après 25 ans de mariage, j'ai regardé ma femme et lui ai dit :
- "Chérie, il y a 25 ans, on avait un petit appartement, une vieille voiture,
on dormait sur le canapé en regardant une télé en noir et blanc de 10
pouces, mais je dormais avec une jeune blonde de 25 ans...
Maintenant on a une maison à 500 000 €, une Mercédès à 50 000 €, un lit
à eau, une télé couleur écran plat de 50 pouces, et je dors avec une vieille
de 50 ans.
Ma femme qui est très vive d'esprit m'a dit :
- " Tu as juste à te trouver une jeune blonde de 25 ans et mon avocat fera
en sorte que tu te retrouves dans un petit appartement, avec une vieille
voiture, et que tu dormes sur un canapé en regardant une télé noir et
blanc de 10 pouces "
. Les femmes sont incroyables !
Elles te guérissent vite de ta crise de la cinquantaine...

Why is this joke more amusing in French?

So Much For The Sisterhood

From the American Lawyer
The End of Sisterhood
Posted by Dimitra Kessenides

The message is clear: Women are united, and they want their sisters to succeed.
But scratch the surface a bit deeper, and some members of the sorority tell another story: that women--particularly their immediate superiors--can be their worst tormentors. Fact is, despite the veneer of harmony and the decades of shared struggle, there's tension on the women's front. Talk to any group of women lawyers, and there will be plenty of war stories on the betrayals--real or perceived--that they have experienced at the hands of other women.

read the rest

From the New York Times
Backlash: Women Bullying Women at Work

It’s probably no surprise that most of these bullies are men, as a survey by the Workplace Bullying Institute, an advocacy group, makes clear. But a good 40 percent of bullies are women. And at least the male bullies take an egalitarian approach, mowing down men and women pretty much in equal measure. The women appear to prefer their own kind, choosing other women as targets more than 70 percent of the time.

read the rest


I work in a harem....no seriously I do. The office make-up is 8 women (the harem) to 1 man (the sultan). It is the perfect environment for an Organizational Development case study..maybe I should've paid more attention to the subject in B-school....then again the professor shouldn't have been such a smug bitch...but I digress.
Let's just say that it endlessly amuses me to sit back and watch the office dynamics.

And to anyone who thinks that the world would be a kinder, gentler place if controlled by a coterie of women....may I humbly suggest that you work in an office dominated by women and then give me your opinion....

The truth is ugly
h/t BL1Y

Dangerous Dating

The Perils of Cyber Dating by Julie Spira

Yep, I definitely think that I could have used this book last year when I made a brief foray into the world of Match.com. After avoiding the whole online dating thing for years I decided to take the plunge last November.

Having no experience at this I was totally confused when it came to writing my profile and I made some serious mistakes...I posted my actual photo (not professional head shots and bikini shots that had been photoshopped), I listed my actual age and I didn't write a nonsense physical/personal description because somewhere deep down I believe in truth in advertising.

I love what Amy Alkon says about this in her post Match Dot Con

A seasoned shopper on an online dating site doesn't just wonder if everybody's lying, he expects it. People will tell you right in their profile that honesty is extremely important to them -- then sandwich that claim between more fudge than you can buy in one of those candy stores you see in the mall.
In the 4-6 weeks that I was on Match, I met a total of three men, all bright, funny, attractive, successful and age appropriate (well in the case of 2 out of the 3...the third was waaaay too young but hey...he contacted me...and he had a cute accent) The whole thing just seemed too contrived and forced and let's face it, I didn't have the energy or the enthusiasm to market myself properly.

Not to mention that during this same time, my drop dead gorgeous 26 year old assistant with a face and body like Scarlett Johansson and two degrees from Berkeley and a UCLA law degree (!!) was on Match and couldn't get a decent date.

Something was just soooo wrong.

Admittedly, I'm jaded but Match.com seemed to be nothing more than an online shopping site for men.

So now, the closest I would get to dating is reading it about it on the web....and trust me....it's pretty ugly out there.

BL1Y, The Daily Flavor, Misadventures in Dating, DABA and Woman of Experience.

btw...Woman of Experience who has brought us some of the best writing on the subject of dating is serializing her novel Toxic People online, check it out at here.

Quote of the Day - "Women Get So Ripped Off!"

Burberry Prorsum Dress at Net a Porter $2995

Yesterday, I was surfing the shopping sites with my main man...

no not my bf...the estate jewelry buyer extraordinaire that I learned all my tricks from.

He and I were checking out what was available online in terms of designer fashions and

we came upon this dress.

His comment "Three Thousand Dollars....Sheesh, women get so ripped off!"

I'd have to say that most of the men that I know would have said the exact same thing.

What do you think. Is this dress...at this price...a ripoff or not?

What would your main man say about this dress?

Would he think that $3000 was a reasonable price?

Why Men Don't Pole Dance

Why men don't pole dance
Hat tip Random Thoughts

Dating Rules and Reasons For Cheating

OMG...I'm so confused.

Thank God I'm long beyond the dating scene because there are new rules for dating...and they're not nice.

OK...this is supposed to be tongue in cheek...but it's kinda not.

From the Misadventures in Dating Blog

we've got He Man Women Hater's Dating Rules

1. Boys do what they can, men do what they want.
2. If you don’t know the guy or he is a douche, fuck his gf and/or wife to within an inch of her life. 3. Guilt is for pussies, however if you do something without her consent (includes getting her drunk douche bag) you should be castrated, fed your dick and shot in the head.
4. As with the markets celebrate your victories and move on to the next. Your score doesn’t go up if you keep hitting the same piece of ass.
5. Attachment is for pussies. “Date” as many as you can.
6. If you are dating 2+ at a time, lay it out there, if they can’t handle it, they can piss and the fuck off to an Analyst (had to put a jab in there).
7. Pick your targets before you get drunk. (Saves you from waking up Coyote Ugly).
8. Both Harper and BL1Y speak of the this relationship thing, I’m sorry but it does not compute.
9. Who cares what people think. Are you sheep? Be a fucking man. Fuck em!
10. Never lie, your friends appreciate the rejection/coyote ugly/drunk/disgusting/embarrassing stories more than you know. Just not as much as the women readers do…

In conjunction with The Hit List

The Jewish Chic
The Indian Chic
The Spaniard Chic
The Cuban Chic
The Argentinian Chic
The Brazilian Chic
The Middle Eastern Chic
The Greek Chic
The Swedish Chic
The Brit Chic
The European Chic (Russian)
The Bo Derek (10) Chic
The Artist/Musician/Model/Waitress
The Athletic Chic
The Good Chic (Best Liar)
The Bad Chic (Slut)
The Dog Lover Chic
The Doctor Chic
The Attorney Chic
The Over 30
The Single Mom Chic
The Bridge and Tunnel (B&T/SI) Chic
The Blue Collar Chic (Stripper)
The Ivy league/DABA/ High Maintenance Girl Chic
The Party Girl Chic
The Hott Dumb Chic (Since stripper was taken, any other will do)

(I like the fact that the older woman chic is over 30!!!)

All of this in response to a post from The Daily Flavor

Dating Rules for Females
1. Do what you want.
2. Get what you want - most* of the time “the end justifies the means” in dating. *home wrecking is never OK!
3. Never feel guilty about getting what you want.
4. Always rejoice in your victories.
5. Don’t get too attached to quickly, even if you have to date 3 + men at a time.
6. If you are dating 3+ at a time, don’t let the participants know.
7. Do judge a book by it’s cover, at first! Then add up all the other positives and negatives.
8. Do put in all the work necessary to make a relationship work, once you choose it.
9. Don’t act or feel insecure - it’s unflattering, and if you begin to feel this way spend 10 mins analyzing why, and then never think about it again, just move on.
10. Never settle, not even for one night or five minutes.

OK...so even though this is tongue in cheek there is something still so sad about it.

Oh...it's so good to be middle aged.

Then we have from Yahoo

9 Reasons People Cheat

1. Bored

2. Dependence

3. Confusion

4. Because They Let You

5. Nurturing

6. Revenge

7. Confirmation of Attractiveness

8. The Thrill

9. They Don't Consider It Cheating, Even Though You Might

This subject has been on my mind the last week or two because of a situation with one of my young colleagues. After 4 months of dating a man that she fell madly in love with, she found out...through Facebook of course, that he was married with two children. (It's amazing what you can learn through Facebook...another topic for another post)

So, I give you reason number 10

10. Because They Can...And They Will

Social Primer - Now More Than Ever

Let's face it, Chivalry is dead and sometimes I wonder if all gentlemanly manners have disappeared forever. Will my daughter ever even meet a man who knows any etiquette at all. I sincerely doubt it. In this generation of hook-ups and communication by text message, will she ever meet a man who knows how to write a formal note, use proper table manners or stand up when she approaches the table.

Well, finally I have a little hope after discovering this website.

Social Primer, Manners, Conversation, Style & Handling Your Liquor

Raison d'Etre

SocialPrimer as Utopia
Like Sir Thomas More’s idyllic island Utopia, SP envisions SocialPrimer as a place where the ideal of a well-mannered society can exist. Readers of these pages know that SP sets the bar high, so yes, Sir Thomas More would be a suitable comparison. Moving on. We inhabit an increasingly frenetic world where manners are often considered a liability; I created this little island on the internet to lament, rant and in the end dream of a more civilized world.

Good manners are not congenital. Just as Homo eructus did not saunter out of the cave knowing which fork to use and when to stand to greet a lady, not all of us were born with parents who inheritably knew the correct way to proceed through life. Good manners are taught and learned. SP pines for an ideal world where manners and civility are the common order of the day, not extraordinary occurrences that warrant attention. What could be more idyllic that that?

I appreciate Social Primer's call for civility....and you should to.

Check out his website.

Dating In A Downturn

From the Atlantic.com by way of Instapundit

Feb 26 2009, 1:05 pm by Reihan Salam
Dating in a Downturn

In yesterday's Washington Post, Tara Bahrampour filed a dispatch on dating in an economic downturn.

From investment bankers to real estate developers to construction workers, no job means no buying rounds of $15 martinis for a pretty woman and her girlfriends. No hosting parties in the bachelor loft. And often, no idea how to present one's new self on the dating market.

The real issue is: will an economic downturn break the back of the regime in which women are expected to take, and are socialized into, the role of the provided-for party? Given the fact that women's rates of educational attainment are surpassing that of men, and the fact that the downturn will likely accelerate the decline of a number of male-dominated professions -- construction, finance, etc. -- will we see a sharp rise in the economic power of women that will lead to a corresponding change in the sexual marketplace?

We shall see...

What A Way To Go

From FoxNews.com

Man, 28, Dies After 'Guzzling' Viagra During 12-Hour Romp

A Russian man died after guzzling a bottle of Viagra to keep him going for a 12-hour orgy with two female pals.
The women had bet mechanic Sergey Tuganov $4,300 that he wouldn’t be able to follow through with the half-day sex marathon.
But minutes after winning the bet, the 28-year-old died of a heart attack, Moscow police said.
“We called emergency services but it was too late, there was nothing they could do,” said one of the female participants who identified herself only as Alina.

Dating and Drinking - Men versus Women

What goes through your mind when someone says
"Let's go for a drink"

Or...why we love men...and beer.

Terje's First Descent

For some reason when I look at the top of a snow covered mountain I just don't feel the need to do this...

Is there A Recession In The Bedroom?

From the BBC
Is sexual desire entering a recession?

Valentine's Day, by tradition, is an opportunity for declarations of love and lust. But will 2009 be different?
Given the economic downturn, is passion too in recession? Or will couples fling themselves into each other's arms to compensate for their inability to spend, spend, spend?

Apparently according to the BBC

The sheer stress of money worries in general, and fear of redundancy in particular will, she argues, elevate levels of the chemical dopamine in the brain - and dopamine is associated with romantic love.
"Times of stress can trigger feelings of attraction - quite simply, you're more susceptible," she said.

Then again

Denise Knowles, Relate sex therapist, said: "Economic uncertainties can cause people to become more anxious - with the added dimension of people trying to get another job, or working longer hours to cover for a partner who has lost theirs.
"In the end, they are simply less likely to want sexual activity at the end of a long day."
In addition, the very anxiety that may be fuelling the initial desire to bond sexually may also sap the ability to experience pleasure.
Self-esteem classically drops during recession, particularly for those who actively lose their jobs.
Equally, respect drops for a partner who is economically less successful.
Then, desire plummets along with the esteem and respect.

Can this be true?

Are these theories contradictory? Does the recession create lust - or sap it? Does a lack of money lead to a raising of desire - or a lowering of sexual action?

Maybe economic woes bring us together but then make us unable to enjoy the fruits of that bonding.

Dr. De Ville advises that we all try to take the focus off of our financial woes and concentrate on the people in our lives that we care about.
Recessions come and go...but life is so very short and as John Maynard Keynes said, in the long run we are all dead. So why not leave recessionary issues out of the bedroom.

The Key To Kissing

From Popular Science
And they ought to know this stuff....

The Secret of Successful Kissing

Can drooling make you a better kisser? Scientific evidence suggests that wet, sloppy smooches pack a bigger biochemical punch than dry kisses and thus may be more likely to lead to sex and reproduction, says Rutgers University researcher Helen Fischer, who spoke today at the AAAS conference in Chicago.

Men are particularly prone to sloppy kissing, she notes, possibly because males tend to have a poor sense of smell and taste and aggressive face sucking may be an unconscious effort to gauge a partner's estrogen levels and fertility cycle. It may also be an unwitting effort to transmit testosterone, which can be found in saliva and can increase sexual attraction. Alternatively, it may also be just plain gross. (That would be my unscientific conclusion.)

Fisher and other scientists who study "philematology," the science of kissing, believe that the act evolved as a "mechanism for mate choice and selection." It stimulates sex drive, romantic love and attachment, the latter two helping us tolerate people even when we're not having sex with them, she says. Saliva is a powerful way to telegraph your chemical goods but be warned that extra drool could backfire if your prospective mate finds you biochemically incompatible. Hence, the term "kiss of death," says Fischer. Good luck.

Countdown To Valentine's Day - For The Boys

Serious times call for serious clothes...so here's my suggestion for a Valentine's Day gift for your guy.

Today's DJIA

Harry Winston Cufflinks $1850 fromk Beladora.com

Ferragamo Dress Shirt From Neiman Marcus $295

Because now is the time to dress like you mean business.